12 Tips on How To Raise a Child
There are very few great opportunities/ responsibilities in the life of every adult; raising a child is one. Raising a child may not be entirely as easy as it may seem. Children are complicated and they need time and patience to understand and know them. Even though the procedure for raising every child may differ. Sometimes, children can be so troublesome and disobedient that it makes parenting a hell of a responsibility and a pain in the neck.
But yet still, it takes not much more than a blind eye to see that they are a blessing, and having to look after them is a great privilege. Below are 10 tips on how to raise a child. These tips will give you guidelines on how to raise any child.
1. Know your Child.
Like it or not, every child born into this world is a stranger and has no idea who or what they are till we one way or the other introduce ourselves as parents or caretakers to them. I call this the Knowing Me Knowing You period and it takes a lifetime of communication and interactions between the child and the parent to really make this work.
This is where the child reveals his/ her interests or wants and behaviors likewise certain characters and personalities which may or may not seem familiar to us. How we relate to them and tolerate them in most cases determine the future of our relationship with them as parents or guardians.
But it is always best to keep an eye and open ear to the very things they say and do but yet with so much patience and love, steer them in the right direction.
During this period, avoid passing quick judgment and hasty conclusions as to how well you know your child and your higher ability to predict their next mistakes or flaws based on their previous continuous mistakes since as smart and observant as we are as parents, we still cannot read their minds.
Children are very unpredictable when it comes to correcting themselves and making the right choices while they grow and this is because day in & day out, their interests shifts gradually from one thing to another and so does their priorities and behaviors.
When we fail to have a slow and flexible way of dealing with them, we automatically begin to lose track of the changes in their behaviors. This blinds us from seeing certain quality changes and makes us focus only on their adverse behaviors. That is how come some things they do sometimes in life, either leaves us proud or disappointed but yet in both ways surprised.
2. Monitoring their access to the internet.
The internet, though containing many graphic and inappropriate materials has also become a playground for children and a learning tool. Most of our kids today spend more time on the internet through their smartphones and other computer devices than they do with us because that’s where they turn to get the most attention from. Social media is very addictive and entertaining, yet can be very dangerous to our kids. Who they interract with online can have a strong impact on them and how they begin to think, act or behave.
It is very necessary to discuss internet safety with your kids at an early age since they are now going to be exposed to all kinds of things through the internet. Keeping a close eye on your kids as to how they use to the internet is very important although they may seem to like some privacy.
3. Independence.
Training a child to be independent is one of the best things any parent can do for their child. Parenting an independent child is much easier and smoother than that of parenting an irresponsible child. It is okay to watch a child try to figure things out by themselves than to always step in and do it for them.
4. Play together.
Playing or joking with your ward isn’t bad at all since it allows them to feel free and comfortable around you each time and this helps them to open up and tell you things the majority of children can’t tell their parents.
Every parent should try as much as possible to also be a friend of their ward because that is also another way of learning more things about your child as you parent; playing the role of only a parent, you may never get the opportunity to have a proper relationship with your kid.
Playing with your kids will strengthen the bridge of communication between you and your ward thereby strengthening the bond of parenting between a child and a parent. Parents should not be too strict on their wards.
5. Seek advice and counseling.
It is not wrong to seek advice and counseling when needed since there may be two or more well-experienced parents who might have gone through the similar situation you find yourself in. But always remember that your children are your children/ your child is your child and no one loves them more than you do; therefore, when taking advice or counsel from another, consider it wisely and think it through before you act. This is because They might not know your child better than you since you are the one taking care of him/her and not the adviser.
You are the only one responsible for that child’s life and how it turns out whether bad or good and if anything should happen to your child. This is why I always advice parents to always sit their own wards down and have a talk with them in order to get their understanding properly. That is the only way to get the best advice and counseling.
6. Hearing From The Horse’s Mouth.
By this, parents can know and advise themselves and have a better understanding or an agreement on how things should be between them and their wards. It helps the child to reason with the parents, gradually develops the mentality of the child into a more mature state where the child is pushed to take responsibility for his or her word to cooperate with to you the parent as to how things should be run in the home. This makes Parenting less stressful, smooth, and easier.
Read also: 8 Healthy Tips For Pregnant Women
7. Discipline.
I always say waywardness is a disease and discipline is the cure. Most of the time parents turn to overdo the act of disciplining a child. Some think by flogging a child till they cry, they will change them. Forgetting that children are naturally born with the zeal of stubbornness. Discipline can be done without a rod. But a blend of both the rod and some wisdom talk will surely make the medicine go down.
8. Positive attention.
Positive attention is a kind of love and affection which we as humans naturally enjoy and seek from our loved ones.
When a child lacks positive attention from a guardian, they are likely to seek negative ones because children enjoy both negative and positive attention. Praising a child when they do something good is one of the best ways of helping a child make the best of his/her self because it serves as an encouragement for the child to always improve upon themselves and thereby pushes the child to correct adverse behaviors in order to maintain that good image or personality they have around you.
Since the child knows that you are watching and looking for positive changes it psychologically gives them a target and a reputation to live up to in order to maintain their dignity in the eyes of their parents and this sometimes helps the child to keep a decent behavior even when the parent or guardian is not watching.
9. Parenting by example.
One of the most common characteristics of children is they like to mimic what they see be it good or bad. Setting good examples for your children to follow is one of the best ways of teaching a child what he or she ought to do even before you say it sometimes. When children mimic what they see it easily becomes an attitude and sometimes they find it difficult to drop it. This is why Parents should always watch how they act in front of their children or what they always say around them.
Parents should avoid using foul language in the midst or presence of their children since they may learn to also use this word or speak as such to their disadvantage. Instead of using abusive words Like ”Stupid’‘, ”Foolish”, ”F***” etc., which may ruin a child’s way of speaking, Parents should rather consider using more polite words like ”Please” and ”Thank you’‘.
10. Provide For Your Child
Even though this point might seem too obvious or basic, It certainly isn’t. Providing for your child or children is very much needed when it comes to how to raise a child. By providing for your child, It makes your child feel like they can rely on, you remind them that they can count on you for care, stability, and structure.
Ad: Breast Feeding Help and Baby Care For New Parents
11. Know their strengths and weakness.
We were all born with Strengths and weakness which however distinguishes one person from the other because they differ. As a parent or guardian, we ought to know the strength and weaknesses of our wards and how to help them improve their confidence level as well as self-esteem. A child’s weakness may be in diver’s ways; sometimes insecurity and sometimes weakness in his or her academic fields. etc.
Whether Physical or mental, Whichever way it may be, a parent must study their child to know; in order to give to the child, the necessary help the child needs and this must be oftentimes kept a secret as a bond between the guardian and the child since that is the only way to protect the ward from people who wish to use their weaknesses against them.
12. Never compare a child.
It is wrong to compare one child to another since we all as human beings have various differences in terms of understanding and behavior. One child may be a fast learner when it comes to certain aspects of their life but another may be labeled a ”slow learner” just because of his or her ability to grasp certain things being taught to both of them at the same time. This is wrong.
Parents must Never compare their wards. Every child born into this world is special and unique in their own way and that must be first respected among other facts. Parents must learn to love each child differently although in most cases, we as parents turn to have a favorite. However, this should not be made known to the kids since it can create disunity and rivalry among them.
